Pasta is a poor Asian's Ramen

To be perfectly honest, the occasions when I have had a truly satisfying ramen are far and few in between. However, out here in the westward way the the suburbs with our derelict cars and mullet haired ethnics, there is one substitute for the lack of ramen that I am glad for.

This is of course, pasta.

The concept is the same. Topping, Sauce/Soup, Noodles. Rather than buckwheat noodles (Soba), milled flour noodles (Mein), udon noodles, egg noodles, fried noodles, soy noodles, vermicelli noodles (Phen`) and rice noodles (Pho`), you have spaghetti, fettuccine, macaroni, bucatini, etc.

So it is with the craving for ramen that I so frequently go to pasta shops for my dose of noodles and sauce, hungrily jamming wads of tomato and basil coated carbohydrates down my pie hole.

Getting together a few of my close mates, we went to a locally well known restaurant called Le Porchettas. The pasta there was quite nice, I would even say al’donte`. For the price that you are paying to eat there, the food is most definitely worthwhile. The servings are good, the sauce is robust, and the toppings are generous. I had the Carbonara Gnocchi, and the sauce to my surprise was not powdery but actually creamy and delightful. Earlier I had the Marinara Spaghetti and it too was delectable, with a health helping of seafood and impressive amounts of prawns and mussels.

As such for a mere $13 - $15 AUD, it’s quite a decent bang for buck. The shop settings are simple but effective, clearly catering for middle class faire and families. The waitress was quite attentive and friendly for a family restaurant, and even made some recommendations and stopped for a chat.

The Veal (right) was however judged by our mate to be 'dry' and 'un-inspirational'. Not surprising as deep frying a succulent steak in a family restaurant, not to mention then throwing it in the pizza oven would kill any tenderless the meat originally may or may not have possessed.

In other news (and also in code ^.^), seeing that our luncheon was a gathering of titans, it was inevitable that we would assail Mount Olympus. However, much like any Greco-Roman drama it was doomed for the inevitable tragic end. After much debate and construction about the clear and distinct lack of efficacy regarding the US Medicare system, and the poor padding made by the inadequate cover it provided, the verdict was Clintonesque, and this punter resigns to never again engage in open debate about socialised Medicare ever again.

Back to the matter at hand.
This would be my dollar for flavour pick of the week.

Food in da Vietnam and Cambodia

I happened upon a lot of photos of the food and drinks I had while in Vietnam. Seeing as this is as much of a food blog as anything else, of course I will oblige with these rather special and delicious choices of yum-yums.

If there is one thing that truly rocked about the food and drinks of Cambodia and Vietnam, it’s the abundance of fruit crushes. Every thing we had was very fresh and extremely authentic in taste, consistency, and actual fruit (as opposed to bad fruit + condensed juice + ice ala every crush selling place in Australia) some selections are below. One strange oddity was that there was no milk in the country, and almost all drinks used long life milk or condensed milk - making for some very, very sweet coffee indeed.

To quote a colleague of mine, food in Cambodia is ‘oh my god, this tastes like crap, what meat is this?’ This was true, as the flavour was robust and the use of spices liberal, but the quality of the meat was so bad that I could not actually stomached a dish of Luk-Luk beef because the semi rare flesh looked less than fresh. Added to the fact that Australia produces some of the finest beef in the world, and that Cambodian’s idea of a butcher is a cart swarming with flies in forty degree heat in the middle of market square…

I think my other mate had the right idea when he stuck to curry, because our young ward was struck down with a stomach bug so very soon after our arrival. Luckily this punter’s guts are lined with manly Australian corrugated iron from all the mercury in our meat pies.

The food however was disappointing. No restaurant bar the pho` ones we visited could put out a consistent service or flavour. There were almost no foods that were so delicious as to be unavailable here in Australia.

When we arrived at Cat-ba Island, there was an absolute abundance of seafood, so much that my mouth watered and eyes squinted at the alien crustaceans I would soon devour en-mass. However to my horror and amazement, there were plenty of produce but one common theme – the utter lack of chefs.

It would seem that there is an almost derelict lack of high level chefs and even country fare cooks in the over populated tourism city of Cat-Ba. We were only staying for one night, and after surveying about ten or so restaurants, they seemed to share one common theme. All seafood were either boiled or cooked in a broth. There was no French Fusion Crab Curry. There were no Dry Chili and Spice Crabs. There was no Ginger and Shallot Crab with Friend Egg Noodle base. There only thing that did not involve a large boiled crab was variations of lemongrass, mint, coriander, basil, and fish sauce. While in Australia the Vietnamese fusion restaurants were doing so well that I was utterly shocked to find in Vietnam, tradition ruled.

Now for both countries, the street food is the highlight. The subsequent renal kidney failure is one of many disadvantages that may occur. Here are some highlights of the food we had. (Did not blog at the time, so pics not withstanding)

1. Pho` - I never realized pho was a breakfast food. Now I know. Almost daily we had the delicious and delectable pho from the local street stalls and restaurants. There is few things I have had in my long life of eating that could equate to the fresh taste of silky flowing Pho freshly made and swimming in a clear but rich soup of beef broth,. The meat was subpar as always, but the sheer delight of the noodles made my day each morning.

2. Pork Pho` from central Vietnam – worthy of mention because this was made from thick gelatinous noodles similar to Udon. It was also cooked using clear pork soup (an extremely difficult feat for those who tried making pork soup before), and served with slices of pork hock (front paw). The result is a chewy and delicious combination entirely different to traditional Pho`.

3. Vietnamese Spring Rolls – there is something about deep friend rice paper and the combination of mince, carrot, celery, rice noodles, and fish sauce that really kept us eating this artery buster daily for about a month. By the ends of which despite 5 – 6 hours of walking per day, I actually put on some weight. It is quite delicious though, the fact that oil used to cook this was probably never changed in the month and month made this a cancer inducing roll of tiny delicious death.

4. Vietnamese Pork Rolls – after our ward falls to stomach bugs, my other two companions refused to eat food off the streets. I was undeterred and gun it with all I got. The result was a discovery of the most delicious bread rolls. Freshly baked French style (hard bread, hi heat oven, crusty on the outside and soft within) with cured roasted pork (get it before 10 am to ensure fresh slices), pickles and vegetables. The ingredient that really made it (or gave my friend gastronomic acrobatics) was the preserved liver sauce, ala pâté` of pork that smeared the bread and gave it a robust, fortified and unforgettable taste of pure bliss. I love Viet bread rolls, I love it here, but the ones in Vietnam really rocked your taste buds.

There were probably more isolated cases of delicious food, but overall our experience culinary was a little disappointing seeing as we knew no locals, and the tourist packed places we visited all had little more than tourist faire. If and when I visit again, I am going to get a list from the parents of my students and do a systematic gastro workout of the area.

Disgruntled on a Sunday Night

There is a static in the air, smoke from a bushfire yonder
Pervades the atmosphere, like a blanket of fear
Choking, guttural and animal; floating like lime
On a slow spluttering river of salt

A storm rises without warning, but I feel it
Growing with momentum, it comes upon us
An idealist’s disdain for the smallest speck
Of grime smeared like blood across his name

The heart pounds, disquieted and harassed
Growling like a flea infested dog
And where should I begin, to shout out to the wide
Blue yonder, on this empty landscape of mine

The words come easily, like alcohol to a drunk
But I am too sober, and my mind somber
Subtle but sharp, like the sliver of lightning
Echoing the thunder in the distance,

Presently, it will begin to rain
But I forgot my damn raincoat.

Swap Meats

Another day, another luncheon. This time it was Crinitis Parramatta. The restaurant itself is a good one. It enjoys so much popularity that it is booked out on Friday, Saturdays and Sunday almost constantly. The waiters are attentive, and the service is decent. The setting itself is pleasant, with homage paid in large surreal paintings to Mafia and Italia themed décor throughout.

I ordered a Calzone Italiana, a fold over pizza stuffed with ricotta, mushrooms, spicy salami, capsicum, and olives. When it arrived, it looked fantastic. Very rarely do I go to a restaurant in Sydney and find a Calzone looking exactly as it should. A robust puffed pizza pastry with no burnt bits, a solid crispy golden to dark brown on top, and flour padded light brown on the side. When I had dug in however it was another story. Now Crinitis seems to have a bit of a hot and cold going for it. Last few times I was here, I had a fantastic, mouth watering, pleasure inducing Crinitis Crust (olive oil, chilli, spicy sausace, and grilled eggplant/capsicum). Then I had a horrid, bland, oil smeared tuna tomato salad that was like eating lukewarm tomatoes in fishy balsamic vinegar. This Calzone was neither here nor there. I took a section from the middle first, expecting a fresh aroma of cheese, olive and salami. Instead the whole thing deflated like a soggy balloon and a torrent of ricotta spilled out.The first bite was so filled with ricotta that I could taste nothing else; to make matters worse it was barely even heated. Then I started on the side, and it was scalding piping hot, and while it was juicy and delicious, it was also devoid of ricotta. As such it was like eating two meals. I could eat the sides and have myself a nice spicy salami pizza crust. Or I could eat 90% ricotta filling with the occasional warm olive. Certainly I won’t be trying this one again.

My companion ordered a 1kg rack of ribs. Now I am not one to order cairn in an Italian restaurant, but I had a few sticks nevertheless and it was surprisingly good. The meat was moist and succulent; the sauce was sticky and rich. The flavour however lacked basting ala Meat & Wine co, or the incredibly tasty strange grease ala Ribs and Rumps. It was just pure caramelized BBQ/Plum sauce. A mouthful of the underside was evident in the lack of marinating or basting as it was tasteless. The price was the same as the more professional grill restaurants (at $37 a pop) hence I would suggest having your meat cravings elsewhere. Also to note: the sauce was so stick that it was impossible to actually use utensils or even the tissue, as vigorous use of the tissue disintegrated it and left you with bits and pieces of tissue on your hand to continue your meal.

Crinitis is a good restaurant, I still want to trying their Misto de`mere and Seafood Platter. However, its rather hot and cold, so probably sticking to traditional pasta sauce dishes and wood fired pizza would be best.

It's an equally fucked up world we live in

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Poor choice of Rice for Ashfield Noodle House

So I went to lunch in Ashfield today. I intended to visit a Uighur Restaurant but despite the fact that it had a open sign... it was closed. Was it because I was Han Chinese? Lord knows.

I went then to the place next door. It was called "Lao Fuk Xing" aka New Style Noodle House. The decor of the restaurant was very nice, and it made me want to try out some of its food. The construct was a clean, clinical white with sharp black chairs contrasting with white tables. The waitress was one of those modern looking Asian girls who are probably the girlfriend of the owner or something.

I listened while waiting to their conversation, and I garnered that the Owner was Taiwanese, the Chef was Pekinese, and the Waitress was from the Shanghai region. I was one of three customers in the restaurant. Why the racial discrimination you ask? Well for my Chinese readers, they will understand the significance of a cultural flavour restaurant ran by this mishmash of racial disambiguation.

The two dishes I ordered were "Fu Suo Duck" (Crispy Skin Duck wrapped with Rice Pancake) and "Qing Jao Fan" (Shredded Pork Rice with Peppers). The first of which was their signature dish - a pricy $17 dollars for entre`. The second I told the waitress 'tell me what the most popular dish you have here is.”; to which she pointed out this rice.

The Duck 4/10
It looks okay. It tastes like crap. The item I received looked more or less the same as the menu which I will give credit for. However, DUCK is a meat whose entire credit lies in its juicy nature. It should be a golden brown, greasy, tender and permeating that specific aroma of duck meat. However this one was fried to oblivion. The first piece of the duck was dry and tasteless, of which I was unimpressed, by the time I had gotten to the third piece there was not an ounce of moisture in the entire thing, and it had in fact fallen apart when I poked it. The sides for the duck were surprisingly well done. The shallots were fresh and well cut; the cucumber chilled, juicy and tender. The pancake was fantastic, soft and warm. Combined with the horrible duck however it was like eating ash wrapped in watered down seafood sauce. (Hoisein Sauce, for our Asian punters)

The Rice Dish 2/10
Before I blow this boat out of the water. What - the - fuck? I go to a NOODLE HOUSE; and she recommends for me a RICE dish. This waitress is either retarded or new, or both. The rice dish was the most horrible thing I had tasted in some time. My father makes better food, and for you guys who have tasted his explosively bad cooking, you know that’s an understatement. The capsicanium flavour of the rice was so strong that I could taste nothing else in the dish. The pork was so thinly shredded that it was flavourless and served no purpose but as a grease trap. Now, for me the most important aspect of a rice dish is the rice itself. Any self respecting restaurant will use Sun-Long, or at least Thai Jasmine rice. This was buck basic short rice – the soft, sticky kind you use to make porridge because the rice it makes taste like mashed rice-potatoes. As a result any of the grease in the meat on top became congealed in patches of brown soy sludge on top of the rice itself, and the overall effect was disgusting.

Would I go back to this place? Maybe to give its noodles some justice. Would I recommend this place to anyone? No. Pieces of crap like these so called restaurants are dime a dozen, and also close down more often than not given five to six month and a five percent annual rent hike.

Canaan

Wikia Says!
Canaan is an anime television series, conceptualized by Type-Moon co-founders Kinoko Nasu and Takashi Takeuchi, based on the scenario that they created for the Nintendo Wii visual novel 428: Fūsasareta Shibuya de, which is noted for being one of the few games to be have been awarded a perfect score by games publication Famitsu.^[1]

Worthy of mention here for those punters unfamilar with TYPE-MOON - founded by artist Takashi Takeuchi and writer Kinoko Nasu responsible for creating mechandising monstrosities like Tsukihime, Fate/stay night, Melty Blood, among others. Those of you unfamilar with the titles will nevertheless have seen the character Sabre, the face that launched a thousand figure/doujin adaptions.

Whats it all about?
Two reports in Shanghai discover the existence of an affliction caused by a strange virus known as the Ua strain. Victim who survive the 99.99% mortality rate become endowed with strange powers. There they meet with a strange girl possessing supernatural combat prowess, and become embroiled into an international terrorist plot by an mysterious organization known as Snake.

Plot 7/10
A strong cast of female leads each with interconnected pasts become the players and victims of an international terrorist plot. The protagonist, Canaan is an orphan with... a shocking past! The impact characters Alphard and Maria are equally leads with... a shocking past! The male leads are essentially sound boards and do very little except except provide background and motivations for the female leads. The plot is well paced, with each episode revealing a health dose of the plot development whilst still leaving enough of a question to logically link onto the next. (As opposed to say, Code Geas, whose plot is the metaphorical equivalent of a run over slinky) However the whole government conspiracy terroorist plot involves innocent bystanders who then becomes involved in extraordinary circumstances is about as original as Macdonald's new Angus Beef Burger (The Heart Buster). It is certainly works, but it is nether thought provoking, exhilarting, or contemplative. Scene where emotions run high are rather based on warehouse manufactured scenarios of death, violence, and loss rather than anything emotionally fortifying. What keeps this anime together however is the protagonist Canaan, whose mix of innocence and spunk keeps the bland plot heated.

Art 8/10
If you've watched a lot of anime, you will find the art of this anime to be both pleasant and eye catching. One of the topical aspects of Type Moon productions however is to move away from the stereotypical female toons. Canaan herself may be a loli, but she has defined muscles and her curves are drawn naturally. The combat has a high frame rate, with an exceptional level of attention paid to proportions. One gripe I found with the narrative however is the unimaginative use of close-ups and the lack of editing there of. As the narrative progresses, there is an increased frequency of edited close-ups of emotional shots - so many infact that it cheapens the effect and becomes quite annoying. Anyway, back to the point at hand, this is one of the few animes that focus entirely on a female cast, but neglicts to have any female toon with overtly large breasts, annoying little sister stereotype, and or gobsmacking fanservice. Its focus is the narrative and the art is made to supplement this. The art is sharp, the directing is focused, and the background detailed and fantastic.

Quality Control 10/10
Wait, did I just watch 11 episodes without any significant drops in quality, either in art, background, voice acting, or consistancy of the plot? Oh on I didn't!
Well, I did, and what I love most about this series so far and why I would continue to watch it is because it has the most consistent quality control I have seen in any anime this year. (As opposed to uber oppai panty anime Bakemonotagari - covered later)


Thoughts 6/10
Canaan - Canaan is the father of Sidon, his firstborn; and of the Hittites, Jebusites, Amorites, Girgashites, Hivites, Arkites, Sinites, Arvadites, Zemarites, and Hamathites. Later the Canaanite clans scattered, and the borders of Canaan reached from Sidon toward Gerar as far as Gaza, and then toward Sodom, Gomorrah, Admah and Zeboiim, as far as Lasha.

When I first read the title, I thought this would be a provoking anime (seeing as Canaan is supposed to be Arabic descent, and an earlier episodes described her antagonist Alphard as an 'decendent of Arabic royalty) about extrapolated fantasy regarding cannical Biblical affairs.

Canaan is also described as 'hope' (Jap-Hebrew mistranslation?) indicating that the protagonist would be the 'last hope' of her people. This has not come to pass after 50% of the series has expired, nor hinted that it will. I would say that the narrative is an enjoyable but ultimately forgettable experience.